Thanks to a beautiful new study (Run to Him), I have spent the past 3 weeks hovering in the Psalms. Not just reading through, but pondering one ancient song per day. And it has opened my eyes. Big time. If you don't know, King David of ancient Hebrew history wrote at least half of the 150 chapters found in the Old Testament book of Psalms. They were written as songs, though since my non-musical brain finds adding music horribly challenging, I imagine them as poems. About life. A messy life. An imperfect life. He committed adultery. He murdered. He lied. He was angry when evil people seemed to win and he seemed to lose. Wait. Messy and imperfect? How, then, was this written about that man: ..."He raised up David to be their king, of whom he testified and said, ‘I have found in David the son of Jesse a man after my heart, who will do all my will"(Acts 13:22b ESV)?
I don't know about you, but I often read (everything) through my colored lenses. Newspaper articles, magazine blurbs, and even the Bible get filtered through my own ideas about the subject at hand. I am seeing some of this for the first time. God is not calling my life to look perfect; he is calling me to do His will. And sometimes, that looks "messy". Yup, it really does.
Even Jesus' life did not look like MY picture of perfection. Say what?!
His motives were questioned: "The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Look at him! A glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’" (Matthew 11:19 ESV). I want everyone to understand my good intentions at all times even when I mess up.
He became emotional when something sad happened: "Jesus wept" (John 11:35 ESV). I want to be strong - always.
He acted with force to right a major wrong: "And they came to Jerusalem. And he entered the temple and began to drive out those who sold and those who bought in the temple, and he overturned the tables of the money-changers and the seats of those who sold pigeons" (Mark 11:15 ESV). I think everything should be done calmly and quietly - not that I always succeed, but I am a Southern girl.
And, finally, he begged to not go through physical, spiritual, and emotional hell: And going a little farther he fell on his face and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.” (Matthew 26:39 ESV). He asked this not once, but at least twice. I like to think that when I know the right path that I will run after it with reckless abandon...because it is right.
I don't know about you, but none of those stories line up with the picture in my mind. NOT. EVEN. CLOSE. I would call it messy. Not bad, not wrong, just not my idea of perfection.
And these are just two of the "messy" role models for my life. Which leads me to believe that life on this earth was messy, is messy, and will be messy forever...until I get where I'm going.
